The best piece of advice nobody ever wants to hear
November 4, 2010Once upon a time, during one of my unfortunate stints in the world of business administration, I worked in a shared set of offices. One day a woman stormed in, red-faced and angry. She was holding a black velvet board with earrings pinned to it.
“Would you buy these?”
She phrased it like a question, but it was a demand. A furious demand.
I discovered she’d applied to a high-end show and the jury rejected her work. She decided to prove how wrong these misguided, awful people were by immediately selling her samples to anyone within earshot. My office was her first stop.
I stammered something about it not being my style, and she left without pressing me further. I was hugely relieved.
Because I lied.
The style wasn’t the problem. The designs weren’t thrilling, but they weren’t bad. There was definitely a market for her work.
The problem was in the execution.
Straight bits were crooked, pieces meant to match, didn’t. The work was not a good fit for the quality of the show, and the jury decided accordingly.
She didn’t want to hear that.
Nobody ever wants to hear that.
Criticism stings—even when it’s necessary
We’re protective of our work, and sometimes insecure about our skills. We can be completely neurotic about our talent—the thing we believe we have to be born with and can never learn. When someone even hints we might need to improve our technique, it can feel like the world is about to cave in.
Sometimes an honest comment can kick us out of a carefully cultivated sense of denial.
Sometimes that hard landing is exactly what we need.
One caveat: criticism has to be constructive, it has to be honest, and it has to be informed. There are plenty of people out there who don’t know what they’re talking about, but still spew all manner of negativity. If criticism comes from resentment or ignorance, it’s just noise. On the other hand, if someone tells you your work isn’t a good fit for her or her venue, she might think it needs improvement, or she might simply mean what she says (maybe because you didn’t do your homework before approaching her).
The courage to be truly creative
One of my favourite art school instructors had a brilliant bit of guidance for her intro level students: don’t get precious with it.
You can’t get better if you get precious. Creativity isn’t about playing it safe, and it’s not about sticking your head in the sand and pretending the big, bad, critical world doesn’t exist. The world can seem cruel at times, but there are people who can see potential and don’t want it to be wasted. They’ll tell you the hard truth because they want you to achieve the great things they know you’re capable of.
When you commit to a life as an artist, boundaries have to be broken, even if you make one tiny crack at a time. As Leonard Cohen said in “Anthem,” “There is a crack in everything / That’s how the light gets in.” We all need those creative fissures.
Don’t take it personally—kick your critical thinking into gear
No matter where you are in your career, it’s important to understand where your buyers are. Your real buyers. The people who will give you money for your work right now. You may aspire to greater things, but if your work isn’t ready, neither are the clients.
Readiness comes in stages. Creativity is a continuous process. There is always something to learn. There’s no shame in that, and no failure. It’s true for every artist, regardless of medium.
Take the advice and run with it
The angry artisan found a mentor, who showed her fabrication techniques that completely transformed her work. From what I heard, that connection was made through the organization that rejected her application. I don’t know if that’s true, or if she sought him out herself, but she was able to get past her wounded pride and do what mattered most to her. She went on to create a successful business and was able to reach the clients and the shows she wanted.
How about you? Have you ever gotten a creative kick that stung, but then turned out to be great advice? And if I’m preaching to the choir… how goes the marketing?
[...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Kyle Gallant, Stacey Cornelius. Stacey Cornelius said: Today's post: the best piece of advice nobody ever wants to hear http://bit.ly/92ecGN #art #marketing [...]
This was an really excellent read, and a lesson I learned the hard way in school. I used to be extremely protective of my work, I was shot down when my teachers pointed things out to me. It wasn’t until I started to build more confidence that I was able to take it, and even then it stung. I think it’s very important to be able to handle criticism well, and even more important to know when it’s actually constructive.
I’m now not afraid to send my work to people, and actually thrive on solid criticism. I have noticed that with some designers the criticism they give is based on their views of what is right… so it’s important to grade on curve. That being said if you get more than one person points out a problem, chances are that’s a big problem.
I think what you said sums it up perfectly –
“Readiness comes in stages. Creativity is a continuous process. There is always something to learn. There’s no shame in that, and no failure. It’s true for every artist, regardless of medium.”
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Stacey Cornelius Reply:
November 4th, 2010 at 1:30 pm
Your point about more than one person pointing out a problem is smart. None of us is really objective. We can’t be, because we’re human. But if you see a pattern, then that’s definitely worth investigating.
Thanks for dropping in, Kyle. Nice to see you in real (non-twitter) paragraphs.
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Stacey,
This is a beautiful post. Thanks for sharing.
I was just having a conversation with someone about what it means to be an artist. We were talking about the necessity to be open and respond to feedback in a way that allows you to grow.
In my view it’s the people who close themselves off that never go as far as they could.
Thanks for this.
Dave
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Stacey Cornelius Reply:
November 4th, 2010 at 1:26 pm
Thank you, Dave. I hesitated to write it, because criticism can sometimes crush an artist’s creativity. It’s so important to understand the source and the intent so you’ll know what to do with it. Glad it resonated with you.
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[...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Dave Charest, Dave Charest. Dave Charest said: Read this, now ^dc » The best piece of advice nobody ever wants to hear http://ow.ly/34tSi #2amt [...]
Constructive, honest, informed criticism: I’ve seldom encountered criticism from informed sources. I try to translate criticism from uninformed sources into terms that make sense in terms of photography and my understanding of what I think the person is trying to say. In that way, I can use and learn from uninformed sources.
My mother learned to criticize my photos by saying some of them were “too busy.” I never figured out what she meant so I took it as she meant it: kindly and honestly. She found a way to say she didn’t like some photos as honestly as she could without hurting my feelings.
It’s tricky, criticism is always tricky. Thanks for the post.
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Stacey Cornelius Reply:
November 5th, 2010 at 6:09 pm
Family tend to be the worst when it comes to criticism. Too much baggage. But yes, it’s always tricky.
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Stacey,
I just read your piece posted on Fine Art Views. I’m full time landscape painter, and I just had two pieces rejected from a local juried show. I’ve experienced rejection on occasion and I’ve learned not to let it bother me. My work wasn’t the right fit for this show and I can accept that. Your piece articulates this very well. Thanks for sharing your perspective.
Tony
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Stacey Cornelius Reply:
November 5th, 2010 at 6:11 pm
Thanks, Tony. Rejection is never fun, but if it’s just not the right fit, that “no thank you” is a lot easier to deal with.
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[...] The best piece of advice nobody ever wants to hear – Sometimes your work just isn’t good enough and someone needs to tell you the cold hard truth, but do you listen? [...]
I´m not protective of my skills. I always wanted to draw and paint, and plan collages and sew quilts because i enjoy planning these artistic works. What I dread is that at home an artist should work on a different field in order to get money to build her or his artwork. I was so good at it expecting my breakpoint momnent to arrive that got caught and tangled in. I´m not a master in art but love every moment even when it turns into a mess or a bore. I love the way I feel later, but I also need to interact with other people and other activities to enrich my point of view and never forget how I feel today. It took me a long while, it was not planned but it has made me a better person and i don´t want to resign to that.
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Stacey Cornelius Reply:
November 6th, 2010 at 12:09 pm
I think it’s important to have fresh perspectives from a bunch of different sources. Otherwise it’s hard to grow as an artist. It’s tough when you have to put a day job on top of a creative practice, but a reality for many people–at least for a while.
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Found your post through craftMBA.com… Glad I did! Looking forward to reading more. Thanks!
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Stacey Cornelius Reply:
November 6th, 2010 at 12:07 pm
Welcome, Patricia!
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Excellent piece, Stacey! I especially like the “Don’t get precious with it”.
It’s hard sometimes to take criticism, but as you say, the presentation is everything.
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Hi Stacy,
I’m reading your post that came to me via BrushBuzz Daily Top 10. I value criticism greatly but I find too often that people may be too afraid to say what’s really on their mind – like what you did to the girl selling you jewellery. When I ask for criticism, all I get is – great job, you’re on the right track and perhaps it’s true but how can I excel if I don’t get more informed criticisms?. Of course there are those who can’t take criticism that well but for those of us who can, we cherish it and wish more people would be honest and upfront.
Thanks for your post.
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Stacey Cornelius Reply:
November 7th, 2010 at 11:19 pm
Well, in my case, I was afraid to say much of anything–she looked like she was about to blow a gasket. But I understand what you’re saying, and I get the frustration.
Sometimes people really don’t know what to say, or they’re afraid of sounding naive, which is often the case with friends and family. But if they’re colleagues, being nice isn’t always helpful. It’s so great when you can get together with another artist and talk about process and execution, all in the spirit of learning.
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In software development this is sometimes called “collective code ownership.” You can’t do your best work if it freaks you out to have someone else change, correct, or improve it soon afterwards. You can choose to be protective, or you can choose to develop the best outcomes. Pick one.
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[...] The best piece of advice nobody ever wants to hear: I thought, “Meh, I’m sure I’d want to hear it.” But I didn’t. Nobody wants to hear this piece of advice, but you need it. (I’m being mysterious on purpose about the topic of this post to entice you. Is it working?) [...]
I think that there is a prevalent fear of failure in our society. But, If we don’t make mistakes how do we learn?
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Stacey Cornelius Reply:
December 15th, 2010 at 2:56 pm
If mistakes came with a mentor, there’d be a lineup to make them
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[...] The best piece of advice nobody ever wants to hear This is a true story about an artisan who was outraged by a jury’s rejection. It’s a valuable lesson with an interesting ending. [...]
[...] [Stacey Cornelius is an avid gardener who lives near the woods in Nova Scotia, Canada. When she's not digging in the dirt, she writes about marketing for creative humans.] [...]
This post touches on something I’m thinking about right now. I moved to a new city and don’t have my old network of artists I respect to give me relevant critiques. I’ve been searching for a new group or source, and haven’t found anything yet.
Do you have any suggestions for how to find informed feedback? (I post my photos on Flickr, but there is a lot of noise there, and very little meat to the comments I get.)
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Stacey Cornelius Reply:
April 2nd, 2012 at 8:12 pm
The obvious solution is the big three of social media: Twitter, Facebook and Google+. All three can be routes to online artist groups. My advice is to poke around to see which one feels right.
The other thing, of course, is to expand your network by commenting on relevant blogs and maybe sending out a few email inquiries through contacts you get there. Good luck with it.
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